Diabetes: A Mother’s Story
It is difficult for me to write this story because of my feelings about my daughter with this disease. I have struggled with feelings of fear, hopelessness, shame and anger and I know that these overwhelming emotions can be almost as difficult as the disease itself. The mind-body connection is so evident to me. As I work with these emotions everyday, I confess that I have felt like somehow Jennifer’s diabetes is my fault and I know that Jennifer has felt that her disease is some type of punishment or label of unworthiness for her. I hope this story can help others as they struggle and to know that there is hope and possibilities for life that many may have not considered.
When my Daughter Jennifer was ten and a half she got the flu or so we thought. She had been sick for about two weeks, so I took her to the doctor. He ordered a standard blood test; it confirmed she had a virus of some kind, so it was agreed that it would have to run its course. Five days later she was close to death, and after a rush to the emergency room she was diagnosed with Juvenile Diabetes (Type 1). Her blood sugars were well over 800. The average blood sugar levels (for a person without diabetes) are 80 to 120.
Jennifer is now in her 40’s. For the first 20 years she learned how to stay relatively healthy, even as she continued to live with diabetes. But she resisted going to the doctor and having regular checkups because she disliked and feared medical buildings and doctors. To her they represented the judgment and implied criticism that she felt from the disease: an evaluation of her as a person. She took the doctors and the results of their findings personally. This made my guilt even greater, because of my emotional approach to the world, and I felt that Jennifer learned her emotionality from me.
Jennifer and I began clearing together over ten years ago. I could see how her positive emotions helped her take care of herself and I even saw that when she was feeling hopeless and angry it affected her tests when she went to the doctor. We work together at least once a week doing the clearing, removing toxic emotions and energies, so that she can be happy and healthy. There have been times that this situation has been overwhelming for me and Jennifer, so she began to work with Merrilee, our UTUE Teacher who is has expertise with the physical body.
Recently, one of the major effects of Diabetes caught us by surprise. Jennifer developed Diabetic Retinopathy; as a result she is legally blind in her right eye. Emotionally, this was devastating for both of us. Our mutual fear of Jennifer becoming blind has been very difficult. As we struggled coping with doctors and the medical establishment, it was so clear the difference between doctors who have a “green personality” and those who don’t. We had a doctor tell her that it was inevitable that she would be blind and that she should just get used to it! Of course, that was just a judgment on his part that we refused to accept. There have been other doctors whose compassion and heart is truly an inspiration. Without the clearing I’m not sure we would have coped with this situation as good as we have.
Many people ask me to rate the importance of nutritional support, exercise and clearing. The reason we are working with Samantha is because these things cannot be separated and are part of a Green Personality. A true holistic approach is one that honors the mind body connection where the physical body and the emotions are considered. Many in the medical profession expect their patients to “just do it” without any emotional response or resistance. These medical professionals live in a world of denial and isolation. Contrast that with the many medical professionals who are heroes with great heart, compassion and familiarity with human emotions.
Diabetes is a difficult disease but it is not hopeless or insurmountable. I am so fortunate to have the clearing support as well as our other UTUE Teachers, Merrilee and Samantha to help. It is so clear that the mind body approach to diabetes or any disease has many benefits to everyone’s overall wellbeing. Three key components accessible to all are: clearing the negative emotions, maintaining proper nutrition and exercise. This approach allows anyone to take their power and keeps them from becoming a victim to diabetes and other illnesses.