So often we hear the question: What do I do now? I don’t know the new way to be, yet. I do know that the old way isn’t working for me. But, I feel uncomfortable not knowing how to do things differently.
First, we see the old programming, the Ego, the ‘Virtual Self’, suspended in air. This false self hovers there, limiting our brilliance and yet, so familiar and easy to draw from.
Then, beneath that, at the very core of our being, is the ‘Authentic Self’, the ‘Natural Self’, the ‘Green Personality’, the ‘True Self’. This is our Essence. We know there is this energetic source of who we are, and yet, we are so programmed to live from the ‘Virtual Self’.
Going inward, with the UTUE Clearing Process, guided by the Enneagram and our UTUE practitioner who can help us “see” around our blind spots, we gradually clear a path towards that Essence.
Here’s the thing. In the image we described, the Virtual Self, hovering there, is suspended above the Authentic Self, and there is a SPACE between them. This space is like a no-man’s land, (or no-woman’s land :-)…which is like a void, a space of unknowing. This space is where true learning can occur. It really is a place of having a “blank slate” on which to now author your new life.
However, it doesn’t necessarily feel good to be in this void space. This place is an inevitable part of Authentic Life Transformation. It can feel dark, lonely, confusing, anticipatory, and exciting.
This is not at all unlike waiting for something new to be born. This is not at all unlike this season’s promises of new life, new light in a dark world, something divine being born within.
I like to think of this place as a wrapped gift, waiting to be discovered. I like to remember that it’s fun to shake the present, listen to the mysterious sounds coming from inside, feel it’s heftiness and wonder …. WHAT…awaits? WHO…is emerging?HOW…will my life change?
I offer you this possibility: This treasure is worth the wait.
~by Amanda Zabel
We are entering the holiday season, which is a time of family, traditions, memories, expectations, socializing, entertaining, and LOTS of STRESS.
Think about this, November is National Diabetes Month. Right at Thanksgiving (and a variety of religious holidays), when families and friends are getting together, having parties and dinners, baking up a storm and … well, EATING! We are also being alerted that diabetes is reaching alarming numbers. I just recently heard that over a third of a billion people have diabetes. Something is very wrong here!
What IS going on?
While most of us have some positive anticipation about being with family we may not have seen for a while, there is usually some anxiety about how it will go, and often for very good reason.
How many of you have experienced getting back together with relatives and felt the pull to fall into an old family role that may not be serving your present life?
What about old hurts and unresolved conflicts hidden behind the holiday smiles and hugs?
How about competition with siblings, cousins and co-workers? What about the lingering grief about a relative who is no longer with us that gets put on the back burner until we are together again, yet remains unexpressed. What about the company party or the school parties where we are supposed to add all of this activity into an already busy life? We don’t even have to mention the financial stress of this time, and sometimes not enough resources to pull off the expected holiday.
That’s a lot of stress!
The truth is we think we crave sweets and goodies during this time, but what do you really crave?
I don’t know about you, but for me, I really crave connection.
We may crave being loved, being seen and important, being respected. So much of our holiday season evokes a warm, happy, nostalgic, cheery time.
We all want that.
But, really, how often does the holiday season meet with our expectations, our longings, and our true cravings? Many of us seek to satisfy these unmet needs, desires and cravings with overeating, choosing foods we normally would not eat, alcohol and other indulgences. Not really being attentive, we seek to meet our emotional needs with something that doesn’t actually fulfill us.
What keeps us from having the connection, the love, the respect and importance we crave?
Who is running your show? Do you depend on the other people in your life to stop expecting things from you, to connect with you in a way you want, to give you the love and respect you desire? Do you give your power to your family and friends to determine for you if you are valuable, lovable, and important?
The truth is, each one of these things is our own responsibility, and the quality of our relationships has to do with our emotional makeup and our personality, not the other person’s.
At UTUE, we can guide you to effectively resolve and clear old patterns, emotions, expectations, and energies that keep you from having what you really need, want and desire.
We specialize in Green Personalities. This is your personality that stems directly from your core, rather than from unseen motivations and drives. We consider this an organic personality that doesn’t need to look outside itself for satisfaction by needing things from others or filling tummies with holiday indulgences.
Written by Amanda Zabel, M.A.Ed., LPC, NCC, Certified UTUE Practitioner
Rudolph was a reindeer with a unique nose. Some saw his nose as bright red, others said it was shiny, and still others said it glowed. Rudolph, whose uniqueness was very well noted, was very unhappy, because all his life he felt unworthy and self-conscious. He did not fit in with the other reindeer, never being invited to play reindeer games. So Rudolph decided to get some help. He heard that Amanda was the best therapist in all the land, so went to her to ask for help. While she did not have any reindeer groups starting soon, she would help him because he obviously needed help. The first step to helping him was to start with UTUE to better understand his unique story of his life.
First he went to Merrilee, UTUE’s physical body expert, and asked her about his nose… What was going on with this nose of his? Merrilee responded with great heart and compassion, “Rudolph, I like your nose, and I don’t see anything wrong with it”. They identified that he was expressing his unworthiness and self-consciousness, and this was keeping him connected to the trauma in his nose.
Then, when he worked with Connie to uncover his imprint, they saw his natural leadership abilities were knocking on the door, showing that it was natural for him to be out front, leading the pack. The result of this was he started to see how his uniqueness could be viewed in a new way.
Next, when he cleared with Patricia, she said, “Breathe, Rudolph, just breathe, those other reindeer don’t really understand you!” They cleared his unworthiness some more, so he could stand up to those other reindeer, and connected with his power.
When Jason cleared with Rudolph, they were able to see how his Natural Leadership abilities could shine based on his uniqueness as a reindeer. This uniqueness could be developed to become stronger and bolder.
With this new understanding of his story, Rudolph returned to see Amanda. They continued clearing his unworthiness and shame about himself and his nose. He was filled with hope as the snow started to fly, signaling the beginning of the Christmas season.
Then one foggy Christmas Eve, Santa came to say:
“Rudolph with your nose so bright, won’t you lead my sleigh tonight?”
Of course, then all the other reindeer loved him, and included him in all their reindeer games!
In this Christmas Season, a great gift to yourself is to remember the power of clearing yourself to bring your unique talents forward.
Happy Holidays from everyone at UTUE